The new you

Changing your look can be complicated, but I try to make things like this simple. I usually make a little effort at the beginning of the school year. A new haircut, losing enough weight—just a pound or two—to get back into a favorite pair of pants from a year or so ago. Nothing drastic. But still, just one week in, I’m finding the consequences seem rather larger than one might expect.

• When your hairdresser congratulates you mid-cut on being brave, that’s a very bad thing.
• If you stop drinking soft drinks, you can lose a lot of weight really quickly.
• People love to ask you how you lost weight, and generally what they also mean is that you looked like a fat pig before.
• When you lose weight, you can also lose other things, like your favorite bracelet, because your arms also lose weight, evidently.

I may have to take up Sprite again.