Tiny typos

On Chris’s fortieth birthday, he was recognized at the School Board meeting as the Teacher of the Year for at Rolling Hills High School. Unfortunately, we discovered a little problem when he got home. And let’s just say further that this email does not accurately reflect my contributions to the conversation.

From: “Christopher R”
To: “Anonymous Friend at the School District”
Date: 8/22/2005 10:54:23 PM
Subject: Ummmm.....

..I’m not normally one to complain or anything, but my wife says that someone (obviously not you by any means!) misspelled my name on my Teacher of the Year certificate.

Now, I know, I know that in the grand scheme of things that this is very small, very miniscule, but you know how women are....she’s all like “Well, they’re just gonna have to fix it...” and I’m like “Now, honey, it’s an honest mistake. Anyone can make a mistake. Remember that time that you...” Well, to be honest, I don’t remember much after that point--just a long, long period of blackness followed by hollow voices calling to me from far, far away--you know, that sort of thing. But, no matter, the long and short of it is that I was wondering if there was any way that such a certificate could be reprinted so that “Christopher” was spelled “Christopher” and not “Christoper,” but if it can’t I certainly understand because (if it’s all the same to you) I could just as easily squeeze a little “h” in there (I mean it is a pretty tiny letter, after all. And, to tell you the truth, who really reads those things anyway?) with like a Sharpie or something that I bought with district money (of course!).

Ok...I’m sorry to take up so much of your precious time with this insane request. It really is ok with me as is and there is no one in the room making me write this at all. Really. No one standing over me with any sort of bludgeoning device. Just me, writing to you on my own volition.

Really. Get back to work and forget about it.

Ok. There are noises in the hall. I’ve got to go.

Shhhhhhh!

Thanks!
Chris